I had another dream today after a rough night last night with
anxiety. When I went to sleep today (cause of the night-shift), I had a
dream. Usually, my dreams are nonsensical, but they have just enough
story pathway in them to mark them solidly as mine. This one though,
while surreal, made a lot of sense to me...and I consider it a gift from
my Heavenly Father. It will never cease to humble and amaze me that
God speaks my language. I know that your time is limited, so you don't
have to reply to this one. Sometimes it just feels wrong to me though
not to share something after I write it. This was another of those
times.
Just for
background I should mention, if I
never have before to you, that among my many other 'timidities' I have a
fear of 'high water', ie: waterfalls, high waves, or being suspended a
good distance above water. Its from childhood, but it plays into this a
bit, so I needed to mention it. Also since childhood, I've harbored a
fantasy of flying. I've always wanted to fly. As I grow older, I've
felt more and more rooted to the ground by the problems and realities of
life. I guess we all have.
DREAMS OF THE SEA
I
dreamed that I was a bird flying along an ocean pier. In the
background I could hear a loud-speaker droning on about the Titanic and
the Mauritania and how this new ship was called the 'New Mauritania'. I
passed several ships looking at them at times from behind the
glassed-in walls of the tour building, each ship bigger than the last.
They were huge and grand and
imposing. I flew on seeing the boardwalk and the fenced-off shore
beneath me. As I continued, the landscape beneath me began to change.
Flying beyond the boundaries of the sea-port and cities, the shore-line
was less precise, and at times the ocean crashed against large black
rocks beneath me that jutted into the sea. The sea spray splashed high
into the air and I could feel the gentle, cooling mist of it as I flew
through its skyward arc on my set path. The land grew more rough and
rugged the further I traveled, ocean stretching on to ocean, shore-line
to shore-line beneath me, sun rising and setting but my aerial road
never changing. There were times too when the sea rose very high and I
saw walls of foamy water clashing together from both sides like a wall
of powerful natural turbulence. I knew I should fear, and tasted a
twinge of it. I knew also that I should change my path to veer aside or
I would
fly right into it. But I didn't. When I did close my eyes and fly
through, all I felt was the fine, cool mist again that I had before.
The waters did not overwhelm, they fell beneath me, and I was able to
fly on.
Eventually,
as the flight progressed, I flew over a colorful sea-side jungle. I
landed then and became human again, weak and mortal once more. I walked
for a time on a circular pathway with my sister - it was not unlike a
nature preserve I guess, with the boundary fences and man-made paths.
But then, I knew I must take to flight again, something my family did
not understand. My sister rejoined our family, and I took to the air
once more delighting in the freedom of the ocean air and exhilarating
breezes.
As far as
the dream went, that is pretty much its total course. However, when I
woke up, I glanced over at my a daily Bible Quote email that I get ('it
was random') and read, "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by
prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made
known to God; and the peach of God, which surpasses all understanding,
will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Philippians
4:6-7 It was a very clear and obvious message - the moral of my dream.
As
I continued to reflect on this, I realized further that life, while we
live it, is a constant ocean whose pathway we walk alongside. While the
terrain of circumstance may change around us, still we walk. No, in
Christ we don't walk, but fly. As much as things change and move on at a
speed we're not always comfortable with, the creator of the storm and
sea and the winds keeps us up and helps us to fly on. And when the high
waters do come, as they
often will, they do not overcome us. They are, as we see in time,
simply light, refreshing mists that purify us as we move on, reminders
that nothing can separate us from His love or overwhelm us completely
here on earth. God promises this so many places in scripture. My
favorite has always been the verses of Isaiah 43. (but the next several
chapters in Isaiah are absolutely BEAUTIFUL too, up through 46.
Promises from God to His previous children. Sunrise and sunset, someday
we will fly above a shore far greater than these...
-Kaylie
