Pruning

Was it as sad as it might have been?

Did you regret for more than just a moment

Do you still remember when?

I think my vision of you was just a dream

A person I had known from long ago

A part you couldn't play forever it seems

So God please tell me why

Why do You give to take away?

I know it's Your right

But when it happens, what can I say?

I don't understand Your ways

You're far beyond my comprehension

You're too big for my little mind

Yet You've paid for my redemption

Your ways are not my ways

Your thought are not my thoughts

But for just a moment...

Could You bend down to me?

Oh God of mercy and grace

Please show understanding on Your face

And listen to my cry

And tell me why I have to die

To truly live

Am I as forgiving

As You have called me to be?

Do I speak with my mouth only

Yet refuse to fully be?

Do You still know me?

Are You still here when I fall?

I think my vision of You is just a little thing

All that I can understand and whatever You bring

Why can't I refuse to make my own side of You?

To live and praise as wholly this day

As when things are going my way

Why can't my arms reach

As high as the sky You've made

To be as close to You now

As though I had stayed

Right where You've wanted me

Please close this distance

I can't run if I fall

I cannot stand on my feet at all

So lift me near

Please forgive my tears...

Is this daily life as strange

As I have made it to be?

The vision I have of You

Is blurred by my own reality

The more I think I know of You

The more questions I must ask

And the answers are that more must be given of me

I try so hard I make myself fail

I get so tired of listening

The sound of my own wails

I'm tired of fighting me as well as You

So Lord please tell me what it is that I should do

Your death brought life to me

You rose to set me free

So please break these chains of insecurity

And allow me to truly see

That You adore me

Just as I am, this broken thing

Who cannot see what's right in front of me

Who cannot hear Your voice for I am drowning You see

Who do You want me to be?

Please forgive me

And teach me to say 'Goodbye'